Caught myself pondering the vast mysteries of the Universe this evening. I was going to blog about something 'er other but of course, someone had to go and fiddle with my kaleidoscope again, messing up the perfect little image I had of everything... OK. Looking at this whole thing from a new perspective now. I was watching a documentary on the universe narrated by Morgan Freeman, sitting in my chair I dosed off in the first 5 minutes, only to awake to catch the last 3 minutes or so. At the end he was speaking about scientists definition of life, and what parameters they put on weather or not something is actually considered life or not, (for those unaware, as the scientists, everything has awareness lol) ex. Does it replicate itself? - In which case many things such as machines or even cars may do so in a factory, where robots carry out instructions rather like DNA would be used as the blueprint.... this is somewhat besides the point.
So having all of my background understanding from the Desteni material, as well as perspectives of beings brought through the inter-dimensional portal whom have done interviews from the afterlife, I began to consider the fact (as I had heard) that a 'being' can span multiple bodies. This I find interesting, yet somewhat awkward to grasp, as how can a body, or cell, or organism... be itself as an individual, as well as part of other bodies, cells, or organisms at the same time as if to comprise itself of 2 or more 'life' embodiment's/beings?
This seemed strange to me... I have no doubt that there are more than likely perspectives and answers to this that I have not yet been privy to, in which case I remain content with the fact that I will understand more in time. It was then that I considered something that I have already 'known' from a certain perspective, yet perhaps not entirely.
Until several years ago, I had been living my whole life within the assumption that I am a separate being. So looking back at my childhood, my whole starting point of who I am - as who I understood and believed myself to be - was based on this assumption that -- I am separate from reality. Rather Frightening. This 'idea' or belief that 'I am separate' from my reality induces a tremendous amount of fear, if one perceive and consider the actuality that - I am subject to death - Death, as the untimely, untamed, and unknown monster, more evil and sinister than my greatest known fear. The fact that it is not talked about or discussed by my parents, whom are the living representation of God to me, only re-enforces this great fear I have of death within me. It is apparent to me that no one can actually save me from a potentially random terrifying experience, in which case I would have to face God knows what... the indoctrinated idea of hell, or my worst fear of all, non-existence.
This experience of fear, now deeply suppressed, becomes a driving force which impacts and creates my experiences of myself. It also causes me to question who I am, but it is clear that I do not even know myself, and can only guess and 'make-believe' answers, which children frequently do. Is it any wonder that we grasp after definitions, labels, personalities, opinions and classifications of ourselves, desperately seeking to answer the question we are unable to even formulate? Although we cannot calculate precisely, we can certainly observe the consequences in our world, of our collective irresponsibility as parents - deliberately neglecting to address this fear of death within children and themselves, rather preferring to focus on achieving egotistical goals of morality, education, and financial success. In so, many of us have yet to realize the full impact of this indescribable shame, yet we will all see soon enough, as the time has come to reap what we have sewn. This, besides the fact that this world is already living hell for millions.
Who I am, as this 'Belief of myself' as a separate being - is really just another bubble, which eventually has to burst. As long as I am here, I am a participant in this shared physical reality. I could say from a certain perspective that 'Who I am', as this experience of myself, is actually the Universe in totality, indirectly experiencing itself as me, through this physical body. So I must abolish that part of me that is an illusion - the parasite - which is the belief I have always selfishly believed myself to be - so that I can be here in existence solely to share and express myself in the best interest of all life, in so creating myself as Equal to Life. As Jesus said... I am the way - funny I always assumed that meant 'He' was the way, not understanding that Life can only exist in Equality, as standing Equal to All things.
Join The Journey to Life Group on Facebook and check out the Free Course provided by Desteni which is great Self Support.