This evening I read A Psychologist's Journey to Life :
Day 305: The Relationship between Self and Environment
I noticed some points were relevant so I made a self-support video to walk myself through the points through speaking. I then watched my self support video and made the observations and wrote out the points that needed to be addressed for myself.
Small is in the big, big in small
Consequence in all that I do
I forgive myself that I have NOT accepted and allowed myself to realize the consequence of disregarding the small moments, not considering the “small” moments as of less value and therefore creating an accumulation effect through disproportionate valuation of myself within the unequal valuation of the 'small' and 'big' moments.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to submit myself to external pressures and not push myself beyond my minds limitations to transcend my perceived limitations that I have been programmed to believe about myself throughout my life.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to allow my relationship to my environment (through my mind) to influence me and direct me to go into mind states of irritability, restlessness and feelings of being trapped. When and as I sense myself feeling irritable, restless, or trapped, I stop and clear my starting point to here within the realization that it is a mind state and I simply need to push through the point through doing something practical and supportive.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the excuse that 'at least I tried' within the projection of myself into my future in order to appease myself and comfort myself in the fear of failure - and so within that make myself believe that I am better than others because I 'tried'.
I forgive myself that I have NOT accepted and allowed myself to challenge myself in all areas in my life and my mind creations, using the justification that I am trying or doing my best.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create the idea in my mind about doing something and then feel good about it, but then do not even actually do that thing that I thought of doing.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create the feel good experience within myself while doing my blogs, and then forget what I wrote about the next day. I realize I need to go over my blogs the next morning to solidify and clarify the points within myself until I transcend the point altogether.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be directed and controlled by self-interest as irritability and so hesitate and postpone things that need to be done, and so go into idleness and self-indulgence within myself as a point of submission to resistances and the desire to serve self-interest.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to 'zone out' of myself, creating a distance between myself and the moment here, as the mind, neglecting my responsibility to be here in each moment.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define work as slavery and drudgery within myself (I have wrote this before – rewriting it for myself) and so deny myself opportunities to grow and expand myself.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to despair at the point of work within the projection that I will have to work for the rest of my life in situations I really do not enjoy., thus fearing my mind's projection, which is not here.
I commit myself to regard all moments as equal and so accumulate myself to stand equal to all as myself in each moment.
I commit myself to push myself more in my preconceived ideas where I have imposed limitations on myself.
I commit myself to direct myself as opposed to allowing myself to be directed and controlled by my relationship to my environment.
I commit myself to stop being influenced by future projections.
I commit myself to do what is here - within the realization that there are no excuses
I commit myself to give to others as I would like to receive
I commit myself to stop postponing myself, and to investigate for myself the starting points of postponement when and as I see them in the moment.