Day 193 - Daily Reflection

Looking at the extent of the deception in people and the system, it is apparent that, despite the obviousness of abuse, any attempts to provoke realization in others are largely in vain.  I say 'vain' because not only is there little recognition or realization, but also because I myself have to look at my starting point as to why I am so 'anxious' to 'preach' about Equality to others.  Why do I insist on being so 'wise' to think that I can assist anyone to realizing themselves?  It is as if I have taken the point of caring for Life and formed it into a character of myself who thinks he's got all the answers for everyone.  I recognize the pattern within myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get all worked up in my mind about sharing Equality, only to entertain the vain and charitable character, and so watch my words fall into the abyss of arrogance and self-pity.

I commit myself to focus on standing for myself as my priority point, so that I may be as effective as possible at directing myself in self-honesty, and not waste my words and efforts on a fictional character of my mind.      

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in frustration towards myself because change seems to move too slowly.  I realize that this self-judgement of myself is showing me that I must continue to push through resistances to realize change as myself in each moment.

I commit myself realize that pushing through resistances is the key to change and standing up for and as myself as change in each moment - so that I may change myself and realize my ultimate goal of self-honesty.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get discouraged with myself in recognizing this point within myself - where I look at my application throughout the day and see how pushing resistances appears difficult, and at times confusing - as within pushing resistances there exists some uncertainty and ambiguity.  I realize that this point is showing me that these resistances are opportunities for me to realize myself in being specific within my application, so that I can focus myself and direct myself in learning to trust myself to stand by my decisions with absolute certainty.  When and as I see my situation as difficult or confusing I slow myself down and bring myself back to breathing and doing what is necessary to be done, trusting myself that any point of dishonesty will reveal itself.

I commit myself to honor my commitment to myself in my goal of self-honesty through pushing resistances and changing myself.

I forgive myself that I have NOT accepted and allowed myself to trust myself in making and standing equal to my decisions as my self-movement due to past 'failure programming'.  I realize that my entire life has been taught, dictated and programmed to think and act within the success/failure construct where most experiences have been subject to failure, rejection, abandonment and criticizing, thus I accepted and allowed myself to subject myself to that very same system in an infinite loop of self-condemnation and self-judgement, ultimately creating the over-riding fear of failure.  This creates the consequence of me fearing to trust myself to make decisions and take responsibility for myself.  I realize that the process of making decisions and seeing them through to whatever end, so that I can face myself in becoming self-honest with myself.

I commit myself to recognize any fear of failure within myself and change myself to align myself with my ultimate goal of self honesty

Also within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to subject myself to the fear of futility - where I see my decisions as insignificant and of little value.  I realize that this point is showing me that I am still comparing myself to - and thus acting within the fear of - the money system.  I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to devalue myself through comparing myself with money as the value that is dictated by the system rather than valuing myself and each decision that I make as Equal to Life.

I commit myself to stand Equal to myself as the value of Life here and work to create an Equal Money System so that Life can be dignified for everyone.

Day 172 - Routine Self Support

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to skip my routine this morning and so not set or accomplish my goal for the day.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not push my resistance to work towards getting things done that I needed to get done.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abdicate my directive principle of myself through drifting into states of comfort and relaxation when there were things I needed to get done.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I don't know what I want.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to neglect outlining and establishing specific goals for myself that need to be addressed within this current lifetime process.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to treat moments and days differently based on energy values of how I have valued days of the week, where Monday  Tuesday  and Wednesday are negative energy experiences - Thursday and Friday are neutral energy experiences and Saturday and Sunday are positive energy experiences of myself.  I realize that all moments must be Equal and not defined within energy experiences of how I have programmed myself to feel based on days of the week.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear future consequence based on cycles of my past, and therefore repeat cycles of the past because I have allowed myself to be enslaved to the idea that I cannot transcend the past within my mind.


I commit myself to follow my morning routine as soon as I wake up and push my resistances to get things done that need to be done

I commit myself to when and as I see myself going into a state of comfort and relaxation - breathe, and be aware of what I am accepting and allowing within myself so that I may push through the resistance to relax in comfort so as to not allow myself to fall into the subtle trap of self-deception and self-dishonesty.

I commit myself to set my goals for the day and for my lifetime process

I commit myself to stick to my goals and my routine so that I may take responsibility for myself in supporting myself and all in self-honesty.

I commit myself to take directive principle of myself and to not allow myself to abdicate it to anyone or any situation.

I commit myself to establish self trust and communication with myself and my physical body through self-honesty so that I do not compromise myself in any situation that would cause consequences that I will end up regretting in the future.

I commit myself to know myself without question.

169 - Setting Goals

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be upset with myself and judge myself because I have not achieved the goals that I have set for myself.

I realize that resentment towards myself for not achieving goals does not help the situation, it is giving up on myself in rebellion and blame towards myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame myself and others for the fact that I have not achieved goals.  

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to rebel against myself for not achieving goals.

I realize that I am not to blame myself for not achieving my goals, as I am still existing within a corrupt money system which constricts my capacity to achieve goals.

I also realize that through consistent application of achieving small goals will eventually lead to larger goals through the accumulation factor of 1+1+1.

When and as I see that I have not achieved a goal for myself, I clear my starting point to here in order to find and address the reason(s) why through writing, and so re-align the point within myself through taking self-responsibility.

Rather than get upset with myself, I move myself to redo the process of setting a goal for myself.

When and as I find that I am defining the process of setting goals difficult or futile, I clear my starting point to here as breath within my commitment to myself to stand for Life in self-honesty, which is my foremost and ultimate goal - to be honest with myself always, in all ways, and in that I have no choice in the matter.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define goal setting as complicated.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define goal setting as useless.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that there is something that I am not able to see that is obstructing me from achieving my goals, and so use that as an excuse to give up on myself and go into a state of depression within myself.

I realize that when things appear to be complicated or frustrating that that is the the point of resistance where I must push myself - through trusting myself to stand and be honest with myself.

I commit myself to - whenever I become discouraged with myself - to SIMPLIFY that matter to being here with myself and moving myself in what way I am able.

I commit myself to set small goals for myself so that I can learn how to support myself through setting goals, so that I can be effective in changing myself and supporting Equality of Life for All.

Day 66 - Self-management

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear making the wrong decisions based on past experiences where so many times I have, within a false starting point, not fully considered the outflows of what I was actually participating in and thus made errors in judgement which created situations that did not assist me, but rather created more consequences which I had to face.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame parts of the system for my lack of responsibility to accomplish tasks that require direction, within this I realize that I must face points that my mind does not want me to face.  In that fear as blame, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hesitate, and not take self-direction due to uncertainty.  Within that, I realize that the act of self-discipline is tied to the point of establishing a stable consistent self-discipline, where I can place myself within the system to interact with people as self-movement and expansion.  My current situation is proving to be ineffective as I do not have enough interaction with people, and thus not enough contacts as support.  Therefore I direct myself here in making the decision to changing and align my situation with something that will create a more stable interaction with the system.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forget to prioritize tasks and responsibilities.  I realize that if I do not prioritize, then I am subjecting myself to postponement as falling into past cycles of living in self interest, doing what I want, when I want as being directed by the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forget what I have written as the direction I have given to myself in my blogs.

Therefore I commit myself to write out and prioritize all the points that need direction, and to direct myself to applying myself in accomplishing those tasks - IN PRIORITY.  If a higher priority task requires direction - I do not allow myself to move to the next priority until it is directed effectively.  If the task is difficult for some reason, I break it down into smaller steps so that I can manage it more easily.

Within this self-management program I am going to run for myself, I will place it in a structured manner and discipline myself to update and assess it daily so that I can track my progress of achieving my goals as that which is required to be accomplished. Within this self-management program, I will commit myself to goals based on time frames of short, mid and long term goals. I will not judge myself if I do not achieve goals, however I will commit myself to consistency and diligence in my self management program in that I am constantly applying myself within it until I am able to walk it and execute it effectively.  If the point is not directed effectively, I commit myself to write out my self-management program again with more specificity in aligning myself with myself here and what is required for me to become effective, and stop wasting time.

Within this self-management program, I commit myself to train myself in making decisions immediately, in one breath, and in so develop self trust within supporting myself in my daily participation, in taking responsibility for myself and my world, so that I will no longer be a slave to consequence due to irresponsibility to face each and every point.