Monday, 28 May 2012

Day 30 - Excuses

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to live my life based on the false belief that I am a good person because I care and do good deeds, such as giving to charity or helping people, when in fact, it is dishonest and irresponsible for any person to define themselves as good while existing in a world where billions suffer - because EVERYONE thinks they are a good person, thus this belief that 'I am a good person' is the very LIE that promotes and justifies abuse where one fools oneself into believing 'I am doing my part' - while refusing to stand ACCOUNTABLE in every breath, and support the ONLY solution to solve the entire problem within our world - Equal Money for All. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that inequality is 'just the way it is' and justify my beLIEf with statements such as 'it will never change' 'it can't change' or 'Equal Money is Communism' - in doing so I am only justifying my fears that I cannot change myself and that the truth is that I do not WANT to change because I enjoy living in my own false mind bubble of selfishness and greed.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to play the game of FALSE HUMILITY, where I continually justify my denial of myself and abuse because I feel protected by the system.  In that I feel comfortable playing the game while my world is being destroyed and life is being subject to unimaginable horrors for which I am in FEAR of facing as what I have accepted and allowed.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to play the game of false humility wherein I deliberately appease my mind with thoughts that 'I am content being/existing as just another clone of the system' with the justification that 'I am doing my part through my good deeds'.  I realize with absolute awareness that these justifications and excuses are me HIDING from the truth of WHO I REALLY AM, as equal to all of my world and reality.

In realizing this, I see that I am 'no better than' a murderer, or a drug pusher, or a corrupt politician, or a serial rapist, because I have allowed this type of behavior to exist in my world through my passive yet deliberate acceptance and allowance by NOT supporting the only solution which would create a world that is BEST FOR ALL.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to play dumb with myself in my mind, telling myself that 'I just don't understand it all', meanwhile all the answers are HERE as me as the physical that CANNOT BE DENIED, because we all move and interact within the physical in every moment, as within absolute awareness of (the denial of) ourselves.  I realize that even DEATH is not an escape from myself as who I have allowed myself to become, but at death, the shameful realization of who I am is faced head on as I allowed myself to live in self-interest and self-denial.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to abdicate life to a personality so that I could CAMOUFLAGE myself within the system and only look out for myself and those who support my selfish disguises as personalities which only serve to justify my dishonesty and abuse of life within my secret mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that the goal of life is to just 'BE HAPPY' in seeking happiness for myself only, rather than support what is best for all.  In realizing this, I see that I have allowed abuse of my world through my selfishness with the evidence being that I am CONSTANTLY SEEKING A DIVERSION such as trying to make myself happy, or being a sports fanatic, or constantly seeking a joke to laugh at, or wanting to get high, or vegetating in front of the TV, or blabbering about the stupidity of the world - while REFUSING to face myself and change myself in order to change my world for REAL by standing with a group that supports what is best for all life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to point fingers, blame and mock the world in an expression of 'I am better because I see how retarded the world is'. Meanwhile, I COMPLETELY DENY that the world is the way it is because I accepted and allowed it to get to this through my deliberate participation withing the mind of thoughts, judgements, blame, irresponsibility and DISHONESTY with myself as who I am and the reflection of me as my world.

I commit myself to stand as a point of responsibility to change myself and support life in every way possible until absolute Equality is established in every way so as to put an absolute end to neglect and inconsideration which has brought us hell on earth.

I commit myself to stand for the only solution that will change my world to that which is best for all in challenging myself and the system to expose the dishonesty within myself and my world which is perpetuated through the secret mind of self-interest and irresponsibility.

I commit myself to relentlessly pursue absolute Equality, and not stop until I have turned this abusive and atrocious Hell-world on its head as a heaven on Earth for EVERYONE.

I commit myself to expose the delusional deception and cowardly lies of people who are promoting love and light and charity as the solution, all of which have done NOTHING but bring our world to the brink through the parasitic, ego mind.

I commit myself to stand with the GROUP which stands for what is best for all in every way, in so I realize that I am supporting the only solution to the enormous problems within our world where no law or guru or religion or politician has EVER considered the consequences of inequality. 

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