Sunday 12 May 2013

Day 217



Looking at an example of a point I am walking through.  I had struggled for a number of years with this point, not consecutively however.  There were times when I tried to stop the point, and did for a number of weeks only to have it return.  I did not consider the point as a priority point, so I deliberately allowed it as a means of coping with stresses in my life, as well as an emotional outlet rather than dealing with the emotions through breathing, self-forgiveness, and change.

So when recently I decided to make the point a priority, I spoke out loud, specific self-forgiveness statements on all aspects of the point I was able to see within myself.  I did this, despite the many previous failed attempts at stopping this particular point, and within the realization that it will require considerable inner fortitude to push through the resistance to change myself in this particular pattern.  So I decided I would continue with the self-forgiveness no matter what, and did so a number of times.  Seeing that I still was unable to fully push through the point - a consequence soon arose as a nausea within my physical body, which caused me some concern, thus leading to my ultimate and final decision to stop the point altogether.

My physical body had at other times shown me how this point was not supportive for me, yet I did not stop immediately. This time, there is no question, all desires are dismissed immediately because of my level of certainty and confidence within my commitment to myself.... I see no other way out. It is as if after I said the Self Forgiveness out loud, my body heard and understood exactly how to deal with the situation and decided to create a consequence to assist me to stopping myself and seeing what is going on and how. Maybe the point is not related at all to what my body is showing me, I am not fully aware either way, however I do know and realize a great sense of relief now that I have dealt with the point(s) and standing here.

3 comments:

  1. Hey William - FYI - from my end, your text is unreadable, it has been 'blacked out' so unless I highlight it, it can't be read.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I can't see anything either William...Just a blank page! or is that the point? LOL

    ReplyDelete