Day 217

Looking at an example of a point I am walking through.  I had struggled for a number of years with this point, not consecutively however.  There were times when I tried to stop the point, and did for a number of weeks only to have it return.  I did not consider the point as a priority point, so I deliberately allowed it as a means of coping with stresses in my life, as well as an emotional outlet rather than dealing with the emotions through breathing, self-forgiveness, and change.

So when recently I decided to make the point a priority, I spoke out loud, specific self-forgiveness statements on all aspects of the point I was able to see within myself.  I did this, despite the many previous failed attempts at stopping this particular point, and within the realization that it will require considerable inner fortitude to push through the resistance to change myself in this particular pattern.  So I decided I would continue with the self-forgiveness no matter what, and did so a number of times.  Seeing that I still was unable to fully push through the point - a consequence soon arose as a nausea within my physical body, which caused me some concern, thus leading to my ultimate and final decision to stop the point altogether.

My physical body had at other times shown me how this point was not supportive for me, yet I did not stop immediately. This time, there is no question, all desires are dismissed immediately because of my level of certainty and confidence within my commitment to myself.... I see no other way out. It is as if after I said the Self Forgiveness out loud, my body heard and understood exactly how to deal with the situation and decided to create a consequence to assist me to stopping myself and seeing what is going on and how. Maybe the point is not related at all to what my body is showing me, I am not fully aware either way, however I do know and realize a great sense of relief now that I have dealt with the point(s) and standing here.

Day 80 - Self Forgiveness for The Activist

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hide myself within a character that pretends to care rather than become actual caring as myself in considering all life Equally and living the principle of what is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that an opinion is based on a limited perspective, and thus dishonest and not real.  In that I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to Value my Opinion Above what is best for all, and in so, I have created an opinionated character who perceives myself as being special. and better than others in my world and reality.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the consequences of what I have accepted and allowed to exist as myself in this world, and so believe that I must take up a cause so that I can redeem myself, not realizing that I am only perpetuating my characters ego, and thus not making any difference in the world because I am not addressing the starting point of the problem - myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that everything I believe about this character of mine was borrowed from others, just a copy and not original in any way.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a character of Hope so that I can gain sympathy from others, so that I may further manipulate myself and others within the belief that I am fighting for a good cause, when actually, I am only denying myself, to the detriment of all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that what I am doing with my characters is in separation of myself as the physical, therefore through playing the role of my characters, I am leeching energy off the physical in order to keep my make believe characters alive - as consciousness.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use characters to justify hiding from myself and so refusing to face myself in self-honesty as who I am here as a physical being, no better and no less than anyone or anything.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sacrifice my self-honesty, only to replace it with a false character of my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that others do not understand my struggles, and so believe that I am better than others because I have struggles that no one sees I am going through, yet those struggles have only resulted in me creating more characters for myself in my denial of myself as a physical being.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get lost in all my characters roles to the extent that I get fearful when at times I do not know which character to play, as the evidence that I am acting an array of characters rather than being myself as the physical which does not change roles out of fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a character in which I can believe I am Humble, and so, when appropriate, I can fall back on this character so that I may attempt to avoid responsibility to myself as all, as well as manipulate myself and others for my own self interest because I fear for my characters survival.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within a character of Hope, in that I want and desire others to validate my characters as Compassionate, Loving and Caring because I have deluded myself into believing that someone or something is going to solve everything for me, and reward me for my dishonesty to myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to receive a high honor, as wanting to be seen as better than others, not realizing that that is hierarchy and abuse of life as is existent within the current world system which is ready to collapse due to this system of abuse.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think of others as ignorant and unaware, without placing myself in their shoes to fully understand their whole life story to find out what actually caused others to be the way they are.  In so, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge others based on my opinion that I am good, because I am doing a good deed, in character, thus judging others as less than myself in self-dishonesty.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe myself to be wiser, smarter, or more intelligent than others based on my limited point of view of myself.  In that I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to falsely blame others for not taking responsibility, when I myself am not taking responsibility for myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be directed and controlled by energy as emotions and feelings, where I will react in situations where I feel threatened, as opposed to stopping myself and clearing myself in breath so that I may speak - not in reaction, but rather speak words as myself so that I can take responsibility to direct myself in what is best for all in each situation, rather than be directed and controlled by fears and projections of the mind.