Tuesday, 22 March 2016
Day 248 - Anger Dimensions Part 1
Dimensions of Anger
In understanding the nature of Anger, I refrain from judgment, as placing Anger in a 'good' or 'bad' context. Anger is simply an expression - a form of communication. Thus I cannot blame Anger, but rather I must realize that when Anger is being expressed, it is showing me that I need to pay closer attention to what I am doing and accepting and allowing within my reality. This supports me to grow in awareness of understanding myself and others with whom I share this reality.
Through my own investigation I have perceived Anger to be an emotional build up inside of myself which is suddenly released, often before I am consciously aware of how it has taken possession of me.
This Anger is a learned behavior/personality/character/trait through which I have justified rash or selfish actions by way of observing - primarily parents - but also friends, teachers, random members of society, television, and movies.
I have at times used Anger as a means of forcefully imposing my own self-interest on a situation, often as a means of demanding that my personal needs/wants/desires be placed at a higher priority within the 'Better than/Less than' constructed way of thinking. Thus I have deceived myself into thinking that I can subjugate my reality, and use physical/mental forcefulness in order to achieve my own goals in spite of seeing, realizing, and understanding that it is possible (and necessary) for myself to change myself to live within and as the Principle of what is Best for All Life.
Over the years I have expressed much Anger, both inwardly and outwardly. I have found my use of Anger to be, most of the time, detrimental, harsh, and sometimes extreme in nature, to the extent that it harms myself and others, often with unforeseen consequences extending outward incalculably.
As we are all aware, the starting point of Anger is most often fear. Thus when I accept and allow Anger to possess me, rather than me direct myself in what is Best for All, I need to stop myself and breathe... realizing that Anger is a Red Flag, as it is a stepping stone in the creation of Guilt, Humiliation, and Shame. All of these are crucial problems which are required to be corrected immediately in order to stop the creation of further ill consequence for myself and others.
Here I will be sharing my notes and Self Forgiveness statements as well as my commitments and re-definition in order to correct myself and change. This so that I may no longer accept and allow Anger to possess, control, or dictate my life experience, or that of others in a harmful, detrimental, or consequential way.
Angst - deep anxiety or dread
Bang (explosive), Hang (death, destroy) ER - Energetic Reaction
Frustration, Agitation, Rage, Rashness, Mad, Choler, Wrath, Freak out, Tantrum, Crying, Mean, Blow up, Snap
Blame - Directing the (negative) energetic emotional reaction outward (and/or inwardly towards self) towards someone or something rather than stopping oneself to see and realize what the physical reality/situation/being is attempting to communicate/show.
Repressed Anger - Re-direction or channeling of ones personal (energetic, positive) desires towards pleasurable instincts in spite of consequence.
Suppressed Anger - The emotion remains vindictive in nature, existing in the unconscious/subconscious mind as thought/backchat, typically waiting for an opportunity to exact harmful mental or physical revenge.
Compressed Anger - Anger that is compounded by layers of thought as miss allocation, misinterpretation, blame, denial, suppression. Anger which is not dealt with but rather 'left on the back burner' for too long often becomes compressed as a person is required to move on in life without understanding or realizing how to properly investigate, address, and correct the behavioral pattern. Often creates resentment and regret as well as many other unforeseen consequences.
Subtle Anger - Seemingly harmless emotional reaction Stemming from a single thought, idea or opinion and left unaccounted for within ones life experience. Can often lead to blame, suppressed, and/or compressed Anger.
Seething Anger - Conscious and/or subconscious, vengeful thought forcefully held back from being expressed. Can be a form of inner Rage as Anger which is directed inwards towards oneself as self-inflicted blame, or waiting for an opportunity to explode outwardly.
Possession - Anger which completely takes control of a being. Typically where a being 'blacks out' in a state of heightened fear, such as a physical conflict suffused with strong emotional rage.
Oppression - Cruelty inflicted upon a large body of beings in order to subjugate and maintain political, mental, and physical control.
Resentment - Inability to forgive as not understanding the nature, solution, and/or context of the Anger emotional reaction. Infers blame of self or others or both.
Fear (or fearless), yelling/screaming, harsh tonality, (volume, pitch), heavy breathing, strength/force, tension/tightness, judgment/condemnation stance, stressed/pressured/anxiety
Eyes very wide open, Frowning, raised and/or tense eyebrows, clenching (teeth, muscles), pursed, stretched or cinched lips, stiff posture, arm posturing depending on type/level of anger
Outlets, Channels, Coping Mechanisms, and Consequences
Drugs, Alcohol, Violence, Music, Conflict, Fighting, War, Hate, Revenge, Gossip, Slander,Vandalism, Destruction (breaking/smashing objects) Theft, Subversion, Deception, Regret, Fantasizing, Escapism, Paranoia, Suppression (Self), Repression (Vices), Depression, Sadness, Guilt, Blame, Humiliation, Shame, Dis-empowered, Diminished