Day 429 - Dream Reflection

 Monday September 21, 2020

Dream

I was with a few women in a very old house.  We discovered a hidden passageway to a very old room which contained an astounding collection of ancient masterpieces.  They were very odd looking, but just by glancing upon them one could tell that they were crafted with extreme care and must have taken a very long time to complete.  One piece was a 6 foot corner shelving type unit with a steel frame that was filled out with extremely detailed beeswax.  The girl I was immediately enamored with the piece and grabbed it as if to take it with her.  In doing so she melted some of the wax with her hands and marred the piece.  There was another strange piece that caught my attention.  It was a closed hand held mirror which was completely covered in a very rough vine-like texture.  It had an actual vine all around it, and the vine came off the top of the mirror as if to form half of an eternity symbol.  I recall how deeply precious this piece felt to me, and the emotion carried out as I woke up remembering the dream. 

In reflection, I see that we as humans sometimes completely miss the beauty and awe of life as represented by the hidden passage.  Sometimes if and when we do find it, we quickly become enamored and get so caught up in the beauty that we can miss the point and try to possess that which cannot be possessed.  I see that we cannot fathom the care and effort that has gone in times before us, but sometimes there is a remnant left for us to discover.  I see that the most dear treasures are not fully understood, they can be felt for a short time, yet the feelings are fleeting, coming and going like the wind.   

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to miss the point in trying to possess beauty

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to misunderstand my own existence, myself, my potential, my expression, my purpose and reason for being

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deceive myself in the belief that I can be something that I am not

I forgive myself that I have not equally given back to life all that has been given to me