Day 84 - Illusion

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that excuses in and as self-denial create Hell on Earth so that the Earth has become the executed-use of Life, relegated to a memory to be forgotten and drained of all ability to give Life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that there will be enough time - later.  I realize and I am fully aware that time was created through separation and self-deception, therefore relying on time in the hope that I will have 'more time' only creates more deception of time as spiraling and diminishing cycles of enslavement.  I realize that my stubborn belief that I was born a long time ago as 'just a stub', separate from the whole Tree of Life is a justification as to why I can persist in the desire to be enslaved to time, as opposed to taking responsibility for myself as all in each moment of time I created, and so untie myself from Tie-me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to jump to conclusions, as believing a conclusion to be something, somewhere safe to land, where I can relax... pat myself of the back and feel better about myself, because I, as my ego/mind, have formed the Great Religion of Knowledge of Who I Am, in my spitefully concocted-illusion as consciousness, rather than physically working to create myself as Breath, as Life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear self-forgiveness, as if it is some kind of imaginary monster that is going to conjure up fear and judgement against me.  I realize that in fearing myself, I am the Conjurer that cons myself, and the Jury that judges myself, condemning myself in the Preference to make myself magically appear how I Like to be as the illusion - conjuring images and thoughts in my mind in the desperate attempt to escape responsibility for who I am as a physical being with an opportunity to become Life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear pain and death, not realizing that I created pain and death for myself, as my gift to me, the mirror reflection of what I have allowed myself to become, as consciousness - a cruel and thieving bully who's only goal is to steal life, as I have siphoned energy off the physical in fear of my creation - Pain and Death - In so I have preferred to be content with contention, and to remain silent and phony when faced with my own self-dishonesty.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I can hide from myself in the secret paradise of my mind, where I roll a random pair-of-dice to run from my self-domination and enslavement to choose a role for myself, as a character who will play out my secret fantasies in Spite of all that is here as me as the physical.  I realize that all secrets are inevitably secreted, and that my mind is merely the magic projector in the back of my head, playing a movie of pretty lights and colors, distracting me and stimulating my selfish addiction to energy, in the foolish hope that one day, the reel would become real.


I commit myself to realize that there is nowhere in the entire universe where I can hide from myself.

I commit myself to understand that understanding is the way to gain perspective of how knowledge is the impostor of Life, and through understanding I can learn how to forgive my abuse of knowledge and move myself from a place of standing under to standing Equal to Life.

I commit myself to share who I am and to give myself as who I am so that I can for-give myself as who I have allowed myself to become - as a database of knowledge - and change myself to support all Life as what is best for all.

I commit myself to expose myself as who I have accepted and allowed myself to become so that all secrets can be forgiven and so we can learn that secrets are harmful abuse of life.

I commit myself to realize that to be life is to be here as breath in taking responsibility for all that we create individually and collectively so that no more harm, enslavement, or abuse of Life is ever again allowed to exist.

I commit myself to supporting systems that will support Life, as what is best for all, such as the Equal Money System.

I commit myself to agreements that support Life, so that Life can be born from the physical as Equal.    

Day 19 - The Trap

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to miss any opportunity within my breathing and life experience here on this planet to push myself/change/direct and manifest Equality in all ways so that I stand in every way as a living example of what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give in to fears, uncertainty and neglect as blindfolds and chains within my world and reality, where deliberate self-deception has been accepted as 'normal' and 'justifiable' and 'legal' thus inducing harm upon ourselves and preventing ourselves from seeing who we really are as Equal - as realizing ourselves as Equals we would free ourselves of all harm and enslavement.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that 'there is no consequence' for the abdication and denial of individual responsibility and common sense, as each individual being responsible for the well being of ALL within considering all Life Equally.  

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to deliberately scheme and configure plans to dominate, subvert and conquer my neighbor in perceiving 'them' as my enemy, all the while I was merely laying a trap to dominate, subvert and conquer myself and thus enslaving myself and all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to deny that I have fallen for the trap that I laid for myself through my deliberate denial of considering all life Equally within the decisions I have made in the past, where I was aware - as all is aware - of the deception and denial of self-as-all within seeking only personal glorification as greed/selfishness/self-interest.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to deceive myself to the extent that my only option left was to lead myself into my own trap so that I could see and face the result and consequences of my actions/in-actions through pain and suffering of all as myself - and so bring myself to the brink of annihilation in reaping what I have shamefully sown for myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to permit shame, fear and guilt to stop me from facing myself and correcting myself through a process of change within applying self-forgiveness.  I realize that within doing so, I am able to assist myself and others to stop the abuse that is existing in our world through denial of facing the trap we are all in.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to deny that there is only ONE way out of this trap of self-deception - that being individual self-honesty, self-forgiveness and self-correction where all may come to the ultimate realization that NONE are free until ALL are free.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to limit and con myself into the con of consciousness which I believed and perceived to be a valid replacement for awareness as breath - within doing so I was denying the actuality of myself being Equal to All existence through the belief that I am separate and there is some 'higher power' that is guiding all of existence and taking responsibility for my dishonesty with myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to trick myself into my own trap through the illusion of fantasy, enchantment, ethereal love, light, and mystery as perceiving those to be the source of life, when in fact they were illusions as disguised fear which has lead me and all to the very precipice of existence, to come face to face with the ultimate question that will decide who we are - Will we stand as Life as Equality or not?



Artwork by Jason Zuckerman